Christmas Laws to Live By

1.         "Emmet Otter's Jug Band Christmas" must be viewed at least 8 times prior to Christmas Day. Initial viewing is to be commenced upon putting up the Christmas tree.

2.         On Christmas Eve, when enjoying a cocktail or 3, do not spout off about your boss. Uncle Hank and Cousin Randy may take you literally and do something rash.

3.         The movie “A Christmas Story” should be watched in its entirety. However, one should resist temptation to stick their tongue on a flag pole. Do NOT purchase a Red Rider bb gun. You'll shoot your eye out! Also, be sure to drink your Ovaltine.

4.         Non-consumption of those peanut butter cookies with the Hershey kiss in the middle is a serious offense.

5.         Store bought eggnog is strictly prohibited.

6.         A big screen TV is the gift that keeps on giving all year long.

7.         Re-gifting is not a crime.

8.         If your Secret Santa gives you a case of beer, it may be time to start planning some New Year’s resolutions.

9.         Despite recent trends and policies, you will not be arrested if you utter the words “Merry Christmas.”

10.       When in doubt, gift card it out.

Marty Carbone, Carbone & Carbone LLP
www.carbonelawyer.com